Winning Losses

“Hey! Old Man! What’s the key to a successful marriage?”

Sometimes, interactions with The Girl – now deceased :( - would float across my mind just before I drift off to sleep. This was one such occasion. Mack turns up. I’m annoyed.

“Being able to prevent these kinds of interruptions from my sleep!”

“Oh, dear, oh, dear! Little testy, now, are we?”

“Why’d you have to bring that up!?”

“Because the Fount of Wisdom always has something enlightening for the benefit of us all!”

“(I’ll admit, he DOES get me with that line of thought …)”

“So what does The Fount have for us today?”

“Tonight.”

“Okay, okay. Tonight! (Geez!)”

“Well … there’s actually a few keys …”

“I just want to know ONE. One key. And no religious razzmatazz!”

“Well, look who’s testy now!”

“I’m not testy. I just don’t have all night.””

“Well, whaddaya know!”

“Please … just ONE key.”

“Okay. In an argument, she always wins.”

“Eh???”

“In an argument, she always wins.”

“You serious???”

“Indeed, Sir! That’s my strategic and determined position.”

“Whether you right or wrong? Dat doh make sense!”

“Depends on your objective, Sir.”

“Huh?”

“If your objective is to win the argument, fine. But you chance losing the girl you worked for so hard to win.”

“Oh …”

“So what you want to do is win the girl!”

“How does that work?”

“Firstly, we are talking about an argument, not a discussion. Now, discussion can be intense, but  it can get to argument if it gets tense.”

“Oh!”

“At which point you wave the white flag.”

“Not sounding very victorious to me.”

“Ah! Then! … some time after, if she was wrong, she would acknowledge it.”

“Is that so?”

”Yes, Sir! Because she always wants to know that her guy respects her, recognises her weaknesses and is willing to give her the space to work it out.”

“Ooohhh!”

“And even if she doesn’t admit that she’s wrong, guess what! You still got the girl!”

“Ooooohhhhh!!”

“Every successful marriage consists of a million such victories.”

“Well, I’ll be!”

“And there’s that element that you so studiously wish that I avoid.”

“What’s that?”

“The ‘religious razzmatazz.’”

How does that fit into it?”

“I’ll give you an example. Once I was dropping The Girl to work, and she didn’t want to put on the seatbelt. It was around the time when the authorities were ramping up their vigilance.”

“Hmm …”

“Things got ‘tense,’ so – she being a heart patient and all - I waved the white flag …”

“Ah! The white flag of submission!”

“Oh, yes, my good man! And I sent an arrow prayer to the Lord to keep the prying eyes of officialdom off our car and change her mind.”

“This is getting interesting!”

“Not ten minutes into the journey, I was subjected to a ‘bad-drive’ and came down on the brakes – carefully, because you-know-who had no seatbelt on! “

“Wohhh!”

“I asked if she was okay; she said yes. Neither of us said another word.”

“Um, hmm.”

“But within five seconds, that seatbelt went ‘click!’”