G.O.A.T. (Back on Track)

“Well, I’m back!”

Can’t blame Mack for interrupting my sleep again. After all, I did go off-track with my last GOAT talk, and didn’t get to make the point of what really gets my goat about the whole GOAT business!

“Back from your ‘Ostrich Odyssey?’”

“Oh, yes. The birds weren’t very co-operative.”

“How disappointing! I guess your campaign didn’t grow any wings, eh?”

“Very funny!!”

“Getting your goat there, perhaps …?”

“How about we get to the GOAT business!?”

“Hmm … Mr. Perry Mason!”

“(Hrrumph)”

“So there are these rolling cricket debates online about who is the greatest batter, the greatest all-rounder, the greatest cricketer, etc.”

“Ah! The Gentleman’s Game.”

“Yeah. But the posts are not so ‘gentlemanly.’ Some are outright ridiculous!”

“Like …”

“I see posts like, ‘Jacques Kallis is the greatest all-rounder by a mile.’”

“And … is he?”

“Well … putting aside what is the standard for being called a genuine all-rounder, cricket is a team sport.”

“So what’s the big deal?”

“Any individual’s performance must be considered within the context of the team’s performance. It is – at least in my mind – foolhardy to separate the two.”

“Oh!”

“Indeed, Sir. Unlike an individual sport – like, say, lawn tennis – an individual in a team sport is almost entirely dependent upon the support of the balance of the team for success.”

”Hmm … I see!”

“In addition, most of these claims of 'GOATness' are made based on the individual’s statistics, which diminishes the value of that player’s input even more.”

“Oho! So there’s that element too.”

“Yes. Now, if I were to choose a GOAT cricketer, I would base my assessment on the qualities, abilities, attributes that the player brings to the team, then use the stats to support my point.”

“So how would you go about that?”

“Let’s start with the basics. Cricket is played with differing dynamics: batting, bowling – which can be subdivided into pace and spin bowling, with a further breakdown …”

“Really?”

“Yes. We’ll get to that later. Then there’s fielding and wicketkeeping. Right?”

“Right.”

“So that someone who can perform, and has performed at the highest level in all these categories will be considered a great all-round cricketer – also called a genuine all-rounder.”

“I read somewhere that some cricket pundits rated Sir Donald Bradman as the world’s greatest cricketer.”

“My pet peeve!”

“Whoooaaaa there, Rebach! You’re bristling!”

“Because these so-called experts can’t tell the difference between a great batter and a great cricketer!”

“Oh.”

“Bradman – statistically – is the world’s greatest batter. But he falls into only two of my categories: batting and fielding. He hardly bowled and never kept wicket.”

“Okayyy …”

“Sir Garfield Sobers, on the other hand, was a great batter, bowled both pace and spin …”

“And there’s some breakdown you have with the bowling?”

“Yes. There’s flat-out pace, fast-medium pace and medium pace. Sobers did the latter two.”

“Wooohhh.”

“And then there’s finger-spin and wrist-spin. He did them both, too! At the highest level of the game!”

“Wayyyy!”

“And he was an outstanding fielder. The only thing he didn’t do was keep wicket.”

“(Whistle)”

“Therefore, Sir, in my not-so-humble opinion, Sir Garfield St Aubyn Sobers is the greatest cricketer this world has ever seen: head, shoulders and upper torso above them all!”

“What about the … er … Kallis guy?”

“Him! Batting, fast-medium bowling, electric fielder. Only fast-medium bowling. No spin.”

“Ergo, Garfield Sobers, by a country mile??”

“Indeed!!!”